


Like the Last Time

by kingofanything



Category: One Piece
Genre: AHAHAHA, Alternate Canon, Canon Compliant, Humor, M/M, One Shot, Romance, Smut, except not really because they dont even get that far
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-27
Updated: 2014-07-27
Packaged: 2018-02-10 14:16:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2028180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingofanything/pseuds/kingofanything
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sex isn't perfect and neither are we.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like the Last Time

Sanji hands shook slightly as he tightly gripped Zoro's hips and pushed past the first ring of muscle. He didn't get much further however, when the Marimo suddenly tightened around his dick, making the poor blond gasp in pain. "Wh-what the fuck are you doing you sack of shit?" He gasped, attempting to pull his wilting erection out of Zoro's ass. Goddamn that hurt!

Zoro let a breathy, almost whimper before answering. "I don't fucking know! It feels weird and I can't help it if my ass rejects your shitty dick," the swordsman snarled, trying to relax around the object that was trying to force its way into his body.

As soon as there was enough slack, Sanji immediately pulled out of the green haired man, falling backwards onto his tailbone at the hurried movement. "Fuck you! My dick obviously was just too good for your shitty ass you bastard!" Sanji spat back at the sullen looking swordsman who still laid on the ground with his legs spread wide and arms crossed over his chest.

Zoro growled at the comment and watched as Sanji sourly rubbed at his sore tailbone. "This isn't supposed to be this hard." Zoro mumbled quietly, rolling onto his side, being sure to avoid rubbing his legs against his half hard member. It didn't hurt when the cook had entered him, not really. He'd had a hundred times worse, both he and Sanji knew that. Zoro was expecting it to feel so much more natural and pleasurable than it actually did.

The blond sent the other man a sympathetic look and let out a small, almost sad sigh. He could see the stupidly longing look on Zoro's face and it was obvious that the man really was expecting his first time to be a little less... awkward. Sanji could safely say that he himself was expecting sex to be a little more earth shattering and wonderful as well. Unfortunately it seemed that it would take a while for them to get to the point where sex was anything but painful and horribly awkward but they'd get there eventually. Or one of them would die trying. And it's not like they had tried everything yet. They still had another shot to turn this... whatever it was back around. "We can try it the other way around if you want. It might be easier that way anyway." Sanji muttered hesitantly, looking to the other man for some sort of reaction.

The swordsman perked up at that, sitting himself up on his elbows to look up at the blushing blond who just sat within arm's reach. "You really wanna try again?" Zoro asked, surprised at the other man's decision.

"Yeah, I mean, it has to get better at some point right? So we'll just keep trying until it does. Besides, it's not like you to give up so easily Marimo~" Sanji smirked, knowing his taunt would drag Zoro right into his trap.

Zoro shot the other man an almost animalistic glare before sitting himself up and crawling towards the grinning blond. Grabbing the bottle of sword oil from before, Zoro quickly popped off the cap and thoroughly coated his fingers in the slick substance.

Sanji, knowing what was coming, fell back against the floor of the crows nest and spread his legs to make way for Zoro's probing fingers.

Sanji's eyes widened slightly as Zoro inserted his finger in his tight entrance. Sanji immediately brought his hand up to his mouth to prevent an odd, strangled noise from making its way from his throat. Goddamn, that felt weird.

Zoro didn't seem to notice and quickly added another digit and began to scissor the blond's insides just as Sanji had done to him just minutes before.

The blond slowly began to relax around the other man's fingers, moving the hand from his mouth to rest it lightly on his stomach. Sanji glanced up at the other man, smirking at Zoro's serious expression. His grin widened as he watched the normally stoic swordsman run through some sort of internal checklist in his mind.

"I can almost see the smoke coming out of your ears Marimo," Sanji murmured, reaching up to grip at the swordsmans's shoulder. "Don't look so serious. It's not like you're performing brain surgery or anything. It's just sex."

"Shut up," Zoro muttered, suddenly adding in a third finger. "This isn't just sex. It's sex with you."

Sanji was about to respond to the odd compliment but let out a quiet whine as Zoro suddenly hit a particularly sensitive spot. The blond's toes curled as the swordsman worked at the bundle of nerves that he'd never bothered to find before. "You're a sentimental bastard," he panted lightly.

Zoro gave the blond a lecherous grin as he worked cruelly at the cook's insides. "It's good, yeah?"

Sanji didn't bother to answer, instead opting to spread his legs a bit wider and let the Marimo press more fully against his prostate.

Already the blond felt a familiar pressure building up in the pit of his stomach. Knowing he was close, Sanji reached down between his legs, ready to pump himself to full completion until he noticed an entirely different type of buildup taking place. "Mar-Marimo. Stop," Sanji pleaded, trying to move away from the other man's probing fingers.

"Oh. Come on Sanji. We-"

"Stop. Now." Sanji begged, desperately trying to grab Zoro's arm and pull him away.

"But you-"

"Zoro!"

"Alright! Alright! Don't get your panties in a twist," the swordsman griped, beginning to pull out his fingers until he was interrupted by a quiet, yet audible 'pffft' from the cook's backside. "Did you just...?"

"No, no, no, no, no..." Sanji muttered, repeating the word like a mantra. The blond quickly moved to cover his flushed face with the palms of his hands.

There was a momentary pause where Sanji thought Zoro was going to punch him in the face, not that he didn't deserve it, but the silence was soon filled with loud laughter coming from none other than the swordsman himself. "Holy shit! I can't believe you just did that," Zoro sputtered out between each bout of laughter. "Who the hell farts during foreplay? Oh my god."

"Sh-Shut up you ass! It could happen to anyone!" Sanji screeched trying to recompose himself. Really he was just glad that Zoro wasn't mad. "Stupid moss ball!"

Zoro quickly pulled out his fingers, electing a small whine from the embarrassed blond. "I can't believe you did that!" Zoro continued to laugh loudly, doubling over and clutching his stomach as if in pain.

"Stop laughing already! It's not fucking funny!" Sanji screeched, still read faced. When Zoro still continued to laugh, Sanji sat up and quickly gave the other man a rough kick to the head.

"Oi, oi. Was that really necessary?" Zoro asked, pretending to be annoyed.

"Yes, yes it was," Sanji replied, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I don't know what you're so prissy about Cook. It's not that big of a deal."

Sanji seemed to deflate slightly at Zoro's words, looking rather put out. "I know, I just thought we were actually getting somewhere and I ruined the mood."

"Yeah you kind of did," Zoro nodded, not noticing Sanji's glare. "That's okay though we can try again some other time."

"I know, you're actually right for once Marimo. Let's just go take a shower and forget about this."

"You wanna take a shower together? That's a first."

"Yeah I guess," Sanji muttered, not feeling like putting in the effort to turn the other man down. The blond walked across the room, grabbing his black slacks and pulling them on quickly.

"Are we gonna have sex?" Zoro asked bluntly, pulling on his pants as well.

"Of course we're not! If we can't do it now what makes you think we can do it in the shower?" Sanji snorted, throwing Zoro's smelly t-shirt right in the other man's face.

"Third times the charm," Zoro replied, nodding to himself. "Plus, three is my lucky number."

The only answer Zoro got in reply was a swift kick to the head.


End file.
